Why, hello there. I am pretty sure that I am writing for an audience of one, since I have all but abandoned this, here blog. That's OK, though, because a lot has happened and IS happening and I need a place to unload all of the crap.
I guess that I will start at the beginning of The Changes. We moved back to the USofA this past summer. I know that in my last post, I said I was ready for this move...but I lied. This has been the most diffucult transition of my life. I love that my parents have already come to visit twice (with the promise of one more visit before the end of the year) but other than that? I hate it, here.
My days are a relentless cycle of packing lunches, driving kids to school, meal planning, grocery shopping, housework and laundry. Lather, rinse, repeat. That Guy I Married and I seem more distant from each other than I can ever recall, I haven't made a single friend and we are making about $1000 less per month, so our financial situation sucks, too. I started applying for jobs within a month of moving into our house (oh yeah, I forgot to mention that we bought our first house...the responsibility of homeownership scares the crap out of me, but it is nice to have a place that is our own) and FINALLY have a real job prospect. I won't say anything more until it is final...but it looks like I will be earning a bit of a paycheck, soon.
The transition has been rough for my girls, too. They miss their friends and the cultural diversity. Abby misses her dance studio SO much. It seems like all of the studios in this area are focused on competitive dance and that is SO not Abby. Rowan spends all of her time either at school or at home. She hasn't made a single friend and she is really struggling with that. There were also some issues with her credits transferring from her old school to here, and we had to advocate for her so that she wouldn't have to go back and retake classes that she took in the 8th grade. It's been ridiculous. The boys seem to have settled in OK, although Ethan already wants to quit scouts and Eli isn't too into it, either. We miss our scouting family in Germany. It is just so different, here.
On another note, my father-in-law was very recently diagnosed with cancer. He has battled COPD (emphysema and black lung) for years but a recent scan of his lungs revealed a large and agressive tumor. He is being referred to hospice as there isn't much that can be done for him. TGIM is planning to go to Illinois to visit, this weekend.
I am also in the midst of a cancer scare, myself. I went to my new doctor's office a few weeks ago for a routine checkup where it was discovered that my thyroid was thickened and enlarged. I had an ultrasound the next day that revealed a 2cm nodule on the lower, right lobe. Last Friday, I had a biopsy done and the results were inconclusive. The pathologist told me that she expected to clearly see follicular neoplastic disease but she didn't. There is abnormal cell growth as well as bloodflow into the nodule but she thinks that for now, it is benign. I am waiting to hear back from my doctor to move onto the next step, which will be to have an uptake scan. That wouldn't give me a definitive diagnosis, either, but it can indicate whether or not bad things are about to happen. If the results of that scan are bad, I will have part or all of my thyroid removed and then they will be able to do a more thorough biopsy of the nodule to see exactly what it is. All of this just adds to my stress about finances (insurance doesn't cover everything) as well as not having any kind of support system, here. Aside from regular phone calls from my mom, I feel like I am going through this, all alone...and it sucks.
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